I look at life like an orange (it used to be a cake but I’m on a health kick!). Each segment represents an aspect of my life in no particular order; family, marriage, health, pets, work, home, creativity, learning, friendships, social life. I guess the names of the segments will look different for each of us. When each segment is as full, juicy and tasty as the next then peak happiness is achieved. Of course life’s just not like that but being able to separate the segments and examine them individually helps me identify areas that need work.
If one segment is severely undernourished it can have a huge impact on levels of happiness.
In 2020 I was in a corporate job that involved a lot of travel. I often left home on Monday and slept in different hotels, travelling between different cities until arriving back home on a Friday, exhausted and disorientated. I loved the job and I felt fulfilled and challenged but also very, very stressed. Out of the blue driving became extremely traumatic. I imagined every approaching car was going to swerve into me. It was utterly debilitating, driving any distance was terrifying and became an impossibility.
Eventually I sought the help of a psychotherapist. One lovely tool he gave me was to mentally transport myself to my happy place as cars approached which for me meant paddleboarding past them. I still do this and it makes driving much more fun!
After a few months of talking therapy came to identify, among other learnings, that my life was lacking a creative outlet. I had never placed any importance on the power of creativity and once I started to nourish this segment of my life and pay attention to it the fog began to lift. Bringing more creativity into my life helped to turn the voices from shouts to whispers.
Shortly afterwards redundancy gave me the opportunity to quit the corporate world. As a result of the therapy, I was more open to the idea of a more creative path so when a fortune teller told me I was going to be an upholsterer it didn’t sound as outlandish and idea as it would have done previously. It actually sounded quite exciting and two weeks later I started my upholstery training.
The intrusive repetitive disastrous thoughts still pop in every now and again but I can recognise them for what they are and have the tools to deal with them. I just keep paddling and hammering!
I hope you have found your happy and have a really full and juicy orange!
